NOTAS DE BOLIVIA: how to live like a Bolivian

How to Live like a Bolivian: Eat a large fried empanada filled with meat, chicken, egg, onions, potatos and peppers while standing at an empanada cart on a street corner in La Paz. Spoon salsa picante, salsa de mani, golf sauce, and mayonaise on it after every bite. As soon as you finish the last bite, throw a 50 centavo piece at the the empanada lady and say "Gracias". Turn and walk directly up a 75 degree incline for 4 city blocks.
I tried it. My heart didn't understand what was going on. It seemed shocked and appalled. Little old ladies were brushing past me carrying a babies and small children. I had to stop at some point (not at the the top of the hill- the hills in La Paz don't end. It's like a Mobius strip, if you keep walking up eventually you find yourself at the bottom) until the dizzyness and heartburn passed.
I guess the only thing more Bolivian and cardiac-arrest inducing to do would be a gram of Bolivian coke in between, but I didn't go there.